An away win in 2018! Keep up the momentum, lads!... a boring first half on the road. Just the way the coach drew it on the whiteboard... the return of Victor Vazquez, Jozy Altidore and Chris “golden top” Mavinga... speaking of great hair, TSN’s in-studio lighting made Terry Dunfield’s mop glisten like a prairie wheat field... that new Old Spice commercial with the dude in the plane... Raheem! An assist, a shot on goal and the energy level of ten men. I really miss him... Toronto’s tight defensive lines leading to counter attacks all night long... Marky Delgado had his best game of the season (so far): his race back to harass Brandt Bronico in the first half, his tackle that led directly to TFC’s first goal, and his pass to Osorio were all top class... lots of talking and communicating across the backline (finally)... Brandt Bronico’s name. Where’s his Stetson?... Alan Gordon stayed on the bench... did Seba have Velcro on his feet? The way he took Michael Bradley’s pass was just “sublime,” and his finish was pure “quality”... nice to see Gregory van der Wiel join the attack and intercept a breakout pass in the 58th minute. His shot needs a bit of work, though... speaking of “quality”, the Steven Caldwell Drinking Game hit a season high: 14. I had to get another bottle... Chicago has a #1 deli ham. Who knew?
No more Nico Hasler... speaking of departures, could both Oso and Alpho be off to the Bunda?... Jozy’s completely avoidable hand-ball in the first half. I guess when your arms are that big, the ball just finds its way... speaking of those arms, why did Jorge Corrales feel the need to kiss Altidore’s tricep? Poor Jozy. I hope that he’s okay... the bobble-head banter between Steven Caldwell and Luke Wileman... Ashtone Morgan needs to come in off the sidelines if he is going to join the play at all... Alex Bono’s distribution is getting worse. The lads need to stop passing the ball back to him under pressure... Kevin Ellis was offside on the free kick and he distracted Bono enough to influence the play. Yet another Vulgar And Repulsive miss by the officials... why is CIBC the “official bank of the Chicago Fire”?
Toyota Park. That place looks like BMO Field’s ugly sister... Terry Dunfield’s haberdashery. Was that a tie, or a family of giant amoebas creeping up his chest to strangle him?... wasted set-pieces, especially corners. Time to hit the whiteboard again... Aleksander Katai’s samurai bun... the “Allez Chi-ca-go” chant... the six-point stars on the back of Chicago’s jerseys. I appreciate the symbolism, but that doesn’t change the fact that they are ugly... am I wrong to be excited over the Campeones Cup? The good news is that I should have my replica 2017 Championship ring by then. Yup, it’s been that tough a year.